today is hard

today it is hard. my chest hurts. i should take a xanax but i haven't yet. ok, now i did.
in less than 24 hours i will make a phone call that may change my life. today i feel numb. and tired. it does not help that i have been looking online for beads and charms to make support bracelets. keeps it close to the front of my brain. the kids are getting on my nerves too easily.
it is too cold and wet to send them outside.
nothing else to say. brain is blank.
huggss